A couple of weeks ago I posted something about having your feelings and experiences dismissed and invalidated. When I was writing that I found myself thinking about something that is quite similar and ties into it, which I’ve definitely experienced is when you tell someone about something you’ve achieved, something little in their eyes but a big deal in yours, something you’re proud of, and they just destroy your pride, make you feel insignificant and make your achievement seem worthless all in a matter of seconds by using what could be as little as one word. They tell you that they or someone else has already achieved this so it’s already been done and it’s no big deal or they tell you that they or someone else has done something bigger (but not even necessarily more important) so what you’ve done is basically nothing.
It does matter how big or small the achievement is, it’s important to you, you’ve achieved something and they have no right to make you feel awful – it’s totally unnecessary to do this to someone. I really don’t like people who do this. People who do things like this generally tend to be immature, unconfident people who need to make themselves feel better by tearing others down. So actually, I feel bad for people who do this because of how they must feel about themselves. But it’s still no excuse for making someone feel awful, especially when they have achieved something which they are so happy about, or were before someone came along and destroyed it all. Even if you think someone’s achievement is no big deal, it’s clearly a big deal to them, otherwise they wouldn’t be telling you, so be happy for them, congratulate them, it’s really very easy. They aren’t asking you to sing their praises to everyone you encounter in the next few weeks. They only want a little recognition for what they’ve done, someone to say ‘well done’ with a smile on their face and mean it. You don’t need to think about it ever again, just sincerely congratulate them and try and show some kind of interest. Even me, who according to a lot of people is a bit of a bitch, can manage to do this all the time. In fact, I do it because I want to. I want people to feel good about themselves and what they’ve done. Empowerment it what we need in this world right now. But we need to remember that people who are doing this are probably jealous, insecure so it’s best not to take it personally and to just remember that it’s them not you.
Please let me know your thoughts in the comments and let me know what other topics you want me to talk about in the future. I hope to see you back next Sunday at 6PM BST for a beauty related post.